Funny it stories reddit. "Sure, just open the window and let me in," the robber replied. Dick. He roared with laughter. I got up in the morning and drunk a kakao. Thank you all for your service, it may have sucked but at least we got some funny stories out of it. My dads other favorite stories are all the times he would take me out in public when I was a baby and I would burp or fart and no one believed it came from me. Reddit can be intense, perplexing and hilarious. I still don’t know what a potato is, other than some kind of food. We were always close as siblings. I squeaked like I had water in my shoes as I walked to the minivan. FOH or BOH, doesn't matter. She appeared to be in her mid-twenties, with a slim figure, edgy fashion, and gothic makeup. I was Queen of Leon, came to the throne at a young age. In an average month, we get a couple million comments. r/scarystories: r/ScaryStories is a subreddit for original, written short horror fiction. The ball hit one of the men. I'll start. Welcome to the subreddit for our funny animal friends! The back of the chair stood precariously on the remaining legs. 3 glasses of wine haven't helped by this point either. Aug 13, 2019 · What made you laugh the hardest in your entire life? Share your own stories in the comments section below! Source:https://www. Bored Panda made a list of some of the most amusing, incredible and sometimes bizarre stories from this thread for you. One day he graced us with his presence and decided he would rather piss around on a computer than listen to me. Edit: Thanks for the laughs everybody. I was on acid and made the stupid mistake of smoking weed. We rented an apartment in an older building. While student teaching, I had a student who was in and out of juvie, had a history of threatening teachers, was absent more often than not, and got expelled by the end of my time there. On the bottom, the larger part looks like a cat body shape when they’re sitting up and that smaller part looks like a tail wrapped around. I'm thinking about writing a comedy sitcom using their funny stories. Rule 2 - KEEP YOUR POST SFW - People do browse TFTS on the job and we need to respect that. Now I hear about it at holidays. Short. A. I asked my mom (because she looked at it literally seconds before) what the number was, and she said that it was 16 cm (the original number). DelightfulAbsurdity. `My dear son! knickinalivin. Fast forward three months or so, had a dream that a tall angel babe in white robes came down to me in a ray of light. Two or three times I suddenly heard an old Not my story, but still the funniest fart story I know of. Where the seat was, was a steaming void. We had to write a speech for the class, I don't recall what exactly, but it was incredibly well fucking written thanks to amp. We are in our 40's btw, so that makes this even more funny. The piper made it up the stairs to the stage safely and stood to one side of the table to finish the tune he was playing, whilst the host waited to begin his recitation. Add a Comment. Then I instantly busted a giant nut in my pants and woke up. Dolphins grind their teeth down to the flesh on concrete walls because of stereotypical behavoiur and stress. The lieutenant checks the private to confirm the story and finds out it was a leech. Interesting, weird or funny chess stories you've lived or seen. • 23 hr. After the initial confusion, my coworkers were horrified to discover that she had left a greasy puddle of DIARRHEA on the bench and floor. ”. ago. He doesn't put himself forward in any way. I looked completely over and saw that where Mike was usually sitting, there was now a Mike-sized hole in the floor. peripeteia_1981. Floor, walls, toilet, you name it. Instead, some drunk rando started playing "Happy Birthday" on the trumpet. Pointless doesn’t mean boring. The cleric challenged the dragon to instead play a game to the death of the parties choosing. I stayed up having a drink going through the comments. They came in through the dark and tried to wake up a girl they knew on the docks, but she wasn’t having any of it and told them to leave. Poked again. Very shy. The teacher started shrieking, vehemently, way out of proportion, I thought, to the infraction: "FLATULENCE is NOT funny! EVER!" The usual hubbub of the classroom transformed instantly into a shocked silence. 16K subscribers in the storytellingvideos Phone message. I showed her that now it was different. I look into the mirror as I have many times today, only difference is that this is the one on my car, and I look terrible. He said the 1st. My favorite is “If all animals were the same size, what would win in a fight?”. 1 1. ) South by the Sea. He then got a funny look on his face that it was April 1st, April fools day. South by the Sea (misc. To my horror, it looked deep. It has an ancient black dragon with a playful but deadly disposition. The stereotypical Karen is a white woman who is perceived to be The 4 kids working at the table next to mine were cracking up once due to someone's fart joke. " *He did. Both of my sons worked as servers and they would come home with hilarious stories. I literally saw it changing in front of my eyes. Thought that was kinda funny though. A place for anecdotal stories of all kinds. There were quite a few girls going, we were told everyone was going to sleep in the family room, and somehow I scored the couch. I'd like to hear from your experiences and anecdotes, so I'll start by sharing a story with you: Five players from my town were on a team that intended to fight for promotion on their league. My eyes that shined in the morning sun now sink into my pasty skin. Id made a friend and amp dealer from my public speaking class. • Mom texted me at 3 am to tell me to stop laughing and go to bed. I walked in on my recruiter talking about getting high the first time that I met him. The term “Karen” has become a cultural phenomenon in recent years. . I then asked him what month it was. All Stories Must Be Horror and/or Thriller Themed. That time hasn’t been without its difficulties, but for the most part, we’ve all gotten along (with each other and with administrators). Does anyone have funnies to share. Blood was everywhere. I was riding by bike around the block when I was a little (probably around 5th grade). I lost the ability to form sentences and got really confused. The woman rushed down to the man and immediately began 687 votes, 16 comments. My dog wouldn't move, and I was getting panicked so I punched the bear in the face. He's always been a cool guy. 3. The students then would start selling and smoking weed. My stomach is in knots and cramping. Taking the posts seriously is heavily discouraged. Several times I got hit in the courthouse elevator. And don't even get started on the dolphin. There I had my first encounter with something paranormal. The guy wasnt circumsized, retracted the foreskin, wiped the smeghma off and extended his shaft. AITA Best of 2022 - Funniest comment. Everyday. User “tybrromian”, on why recruiters should spend more time scanning resumes for errors…. u/myscrabbleship. When they crawled out from underneath the truck they looked at each other and said something like "We're the dumbest people on the planet". You may borrow from other genres, but the main focus of the story MUST be to horrify, scare, or unsettle. ADMIN MOD. Funny spooky story. Lemme set the scene-. This led to emotional cheating, exacerbating his mental health issues. )announcing at Ann Arbor Pioneer HS for a girls basketball game. The smell was a real assault by then, choking me badly. Based on my experience in the service, I wanted to write a comedic series based in the Navy. One time me and my coworker went to McDonalds for lunch and we seen our supervisor eating a happy meal and he was even playing with the toy it came with. r/relationships and r/relationship_advice Last night, whiskey was the drink of choice on the pirate ship. 2. She orders some drink I learned to make like 2 hrs beforehand. Admit it. TLDR: OP (21M) meets (19F) after self isolating from abuse for years, she reveals she had a long-distance boyfriend. Remindme! 4 hours! I am an office manager for a dental office and I have a ton of funny and horrific stories I am going to share with you guys. Unfortunately, being a former CTI, I never once stepped foot on a ship (outside of a cruise during I was 10 when i got my first period and i wasnt prepared for it. Sometimes, the stories that don't matter are the ones that matter the most. •. You’re fucking with us. He cringes lol Apr 17, 2023 · Published on April 17, 2023. Now Sally loved furbies, and above the couch was a shelf dedicated to them. Jul 25, 2022 · The result was almost 33K upvotes and nearly 10. FOLLOW. Two men from the boat stole a neighbouring dingy and rowed ashore, onto the beach in the cove just south of ours. He likes to blend in with the background. It challenged them to a game of cat and mouse and they were sorely underleveled for a fight. Despite agreeing to stay friends, their relationship blurred boundaries, involving deep emotional sharing and physical affection. Walked into his room, and he’s trying to hide a scroll from me. One teed off and watched in horror as her ball headed directly toward a foursome of men playing the next hole. I look around, expecting a dog (felt like a nose), saw noting and went back to talking. Good kid. I feel something poke my ass. Brian Mac Brian Briain was dead in less than a year from battle. 1-2. BG3 is the third main game in the Baldur's Gate series. You get the idea. 2M subscribers in the FunnyAnimals community. Oct 26, 2018 · 8. wuptonator. My husband is a super-duper reserved kind of guy. We ask that authors focus on creating stories within horror and thriller stories. But there had been a movie-like moment earlier in the date when he didn't. Hey team! I’m graduating from high school this summer and have decided to enlist in the Army. throw your best (funny) construction stories below! I have a lot of funny stories. My brothers held up a towel as I took my shit filled pants off and then I sat in the backseat. During one of his last summers, when he couldn't move too fast anymore, he approached a bear and started barking at it. I work at a 24/7 spa where we occasionally have customers stay overnight. The cop waltz's up to the passenger door, thinking he just caught some guys hooning around off work. Hello friends!! I host a comedy I thought about it for a minute, and smiled. Really dark, absurd, experimental, hysterical. One coworker, pregnant at the time, rushed out gagging. It swims in a chlorine full tank. However, I remain a skeptic of the vast majority of all paranormal experiences. EliteEight. I’ve thought about it a lot Jan 14, 2022 · Fresh AskReddit Stories: Reddit, what's your funniest go-to story that is most often requested by your friends? --- LIKE AND I WILL UPLOAD MORE REDDIT STORIE A community all about Baldur's Gate III, the role-playing video game by Larian Studios. There’s been a lot of speculation about this decision since my family can easily afford college and I am more than qualified academically to do so, however I’ve decided to go this route. It stands to reason that at least one or two should be worth a giggle. You're out shopping with your mom, she let you pick out some snacks, maybe even push the cart. The kid clogged a 4 inch commercial plumbing line. A staff started flushing the toilet to get it to go down, and when the turd fell and snapped in half, it splashed water into the staffs mouth. My sister and me would sleep on the same bed. Coisty's a great storyteller. I asked him what the day of the month it was. Until now. My sister is 4 years older than me. Man 1: I was adamant my wife was cheating. I love it all. She was taking a break so it was just me. When I was 16 I made a matrilineal marriage with a Prince of Castille who was third in line for the throne. 54 votes, 92 comments. Taking a moment to think, he tries the door handle, it's unlocked. Pick up any old Woody Allen collection (Without Feathers, Getting Even come to mind). And I said “Sir, before today I never heard of a potato. 46M subscribers in the AskReddit community. I came up to my apartment on the 24th floor and walked in, only to find my wife by herself. Literally no exaggeration. NAD. Members of our team fondly remember Moderator Roadshows, visits to Reddit’s headquarters, Reddit Secret Santa, April Fools One of my favorite funny stories is that in 1977, Australian Formula 1 driver Alan Jones won the Austrian Grand Prix. We told her. I have, ever since I can remember, always been interested in anything and everything paranormal. • 11 yr. My sister falls asleep quickly while take like 30 A couple moments later she stood again and rushed out of the shop without her food. Fuck with the class by turning the lights off and throwing a football across the class at full strength. In elementary school, I was invited to sleep over at my friend Sally's for her birthday. The next morning, not a single of the pink ping pong balls could be found, but the son was happy. For fifteen years, r/Funny has been one of Reddit’s most-popular communities. Here are some of the craziest Reddit stories of 2021. Make out sessions and practically having sex. Direct links to major video sites are preferred (YouTube, Vimeo, etc. Memes allowed, shitposts only on weekends. I just had a funny experience, the other evening: When I was young I moved in with my then boyfriend. 5. Yup, held a ceremony for $15 and an angel came down in a dream and made me nut in my pants. Dolphins get masturbated so they are addicted to their trainers otherwise they would decide to die (which dolphins can do). r/texts: /r/texts - The Conversations Subreddit - a subreddit to submit your funny, weird, or random coversations from your mobile or cell phone. Laughing my asshole off. The cop taps the eindow and asks if they knew what speed they were doing. The truck was carrying ammunition and explosives. Our tastefully curated subreddit harnesses the synergy of storytelling, fostering a dynamic environment for experiences and stories across narratives. Guy was extremely altered, disheveled, and just had a little too much to drink. I notice a trail of blood from the bed to the bathroom, and being a medic, look into the bathroom. A waitress came into the kitchen and said her one table wanted to know what was so funny in the kitchen. No one expected him to win, so the organizers didn't have the Australian national anthem on hand to play at the ceremony after the race. We tried to get his urine, but I didn't want to wait any longer. Ask a question or start a conversation about (almost) anything you desire. I went to bathroom and changed my clothes. The party is passing through an unknown cave and lo-&- behold. childhood trauma p1. You, taught me how to love, what love is, what it can become overtime. My best friend smoked weed next to me after I greened out. By 16 he had an intrigue of 14 or so, figured he’d make a great spymaster some day. Either they were trying to say they were top of their class or that they were a genuine person from 19th century England, neither of which were true. Dude could have adjusted to pee in the urinal but just pissed on the dude. It felt like being back with old friends. Stories with jokey punchline will be removed. George Saunders's Sea Oak is probably the funniest, most bizarre story I've read. Two women were playing golf. I just read that one time seventeen closed the faucet too tightly in order to save water, but because it was winter it exploded and flooded their dorm. The Eyes Have It by Philip K. I told him. Have a fun conversation about anything that is on your mind. We shouldn't be laughing at the end of the story. Apr 25, 2020 · Here are some of Reddit's most fascinating subreddits; each full of weird, wild, mostly true tales that will keep you reading all night. A few days before his 20th birthday, however, the son had a terrible road accident and was taken to the hospital. Not quite a pee story, but a funny IC story nonetheless. Basically my coworkers and I sit in a room, doing a pretty mindless task. At this moment, disaster struck. He immediately clasped his hands together at his groin, fell to the ground and proceeded to roll around in agony. St Peter asked each of them how they died, and the best story got through. Funny stories. So, to begin. Shit poured out of me down my lil pants and into my shoes. A cute one: first (and only) date with a guy, were in a park after a light meal, sitting on the grass and chatting. We walk up to the door he was pointing at, which is the entrance to a small apartment (bedroom and bathroom). Funny Basic Training Stories. Maybe you'll make some friends in the process. After roughly 20 mins, i remember my Philly cheesesteak and Guiness from eariler, along with all the sludge i've just ingested. Now it's time to pay, there's 2 people in front of you and wait SUDDENLY mother forgot her foot cream and leaves lil 5 year old you in the line. I was talking to my friend today and we were sharing stories of things they made us do in school that, in hindsight, made no sense or Ha! I think he hates when I tell that story, but it's one of my favorites. During April fools one year, some wise-ass thought it would be funny to put mustard packets under the toilet seat, so that when someone went to sit down, it would explode and it would look like shit got everywhere. When I get hit with twangs of pain and urgency, the best thing I can do is hit the floor. Stock photo: A humpback blue Introducing r/stories, a cutting-edge subreddit for the reddit nation to seamlessly post, share, and connect through compelling narratives. Where storytellers of all kinds share the stories that no one really needs to hear, or just don’t fit in anywhere else. Funny drug stories. heavyfire. These tales are simply unbelievable, but at the same time, they are completely true. • 8 mo. I thought he was trying to kill me and take over. I’ll probably get into…. Award. • 3 hr. I felt horrible and stopped to say sorry, but all I could do was laugh. Once she managed to stop laughing she went out and told her table. This lady pulls through the drive thru and orders some large drink extra espresso shot and some other stuff. • 1 hr. If the bodies were not carried away, this instinctual drive would have produced a buffet of the feline's preferred snack. browngirlygirl. The passenger in the front responds by holding up a jar with the spider inside and points to my Dec 25, 2021 · By Amancay Tapia. A place to satirize, crosspost from, poke fun at, and hold meta discussions on the never-ending ridiculous stories and creative writing exercises from AITA and AITA-adjacent subs, including classic tales of your local reddit heroes seeking validation. When I carried you, hugged you, talked with you about life, squished your cheeks, kissed you, fucked you < 3 all those times, I just looked at you, and imagined you, alongside me, for hundreds of years. In the process, my finger presses the power button to the surge protector which was connected to the r/offbeat: Offbeat: funny, weird, sad, strange or quirky news that's just. Partway through the journey, they get pulled over by a cop for speeding. He said April. Once I was in the lunch room and I found out a kid had a fucking condom In his pocket and he threw it at a lunch aid and they god so mad and looked at the camera feeds let’s just say he got suspended. Another funny shit story from bootcamp… one night, my guts were bubbling, and i knew brown town was imminent… like, i knew we weren’t supposed to get up in the middle of the night, but i was literally going to shit the bed… So I throw on the shower shoes, haul ass to the head, assume the position, and begin to take a blissful shit…. I was checking my phone under the scorers table. It means “without purpose or utility. At one point he said something like “Enough is enough. Along with the one about how "he didn't kiss me on our first date*. I think it's a cute story. My first real job was at a law firm and one of the things I did frequently was deliver documents to court houses. The word is used to describe a particular type of person who is often associated with entitlement, rudeness, and an overall unpleasant demeanor. Some of the dialogue is really funny, and it's just an absurd story. Best of 2022. Today we want to know what stuck in your head the whole year through and kept you chuckling. 7K different comments, which prove that our life is sometimes very much like a sitcom. The turd was the size of a man's arm up to his elbow, sticking straight up out of the water. ” We want the stories that you wanted to tell, but just didn’t have a reason to. He came to my court and we fell in love and had a great Urtheloser. That night, the son spent on board the tanker. Then i sreamed over to my mom, "you wont believe it, but the kakao floated even into my underpants"! . High school Teacher would leave the classroom and play a movie. I was still new and closing with 1 coworker. The manager wanted to know what was so funny. My hair, which looked polished and trimmed in the rear-view mirror looks mangled and frizzy in this one. In front of just under 30 people. 3M Members. They all laughed. We had been asked to play some traditional music as background to the dinner. When I was young, probably 7 or 8. Funny stories from seventeen's daily life that proves they're living in a sitcom. Let out the most violent fart of my life. 1. The smell was reportedly horrible. A couple other good ones are the Gazza fireworks story and the Gazza burglar story. twiztdfred. I ran over an old lady's foot by accident and right as i ran it over she let a huge fart rip. The original number was there, then it got blurry and then it was a smaller number. ) Ally McCoist tells funny story about Paul Gascoigne and two trout. reddit. u/zucchinionpizza. r/Jokes. Then the narrow part underneath the “head” looks like a neck. She literally just looks like a normal person. When I was young, everyday after coming from school, my mom would make my sister and me sleep for a few hours while she goes to the kitchen to cook lunch. Musaks. Ghosts, aliens, monsters, etc. Can’t tell if my description will make it better or worse, but I hope this helps you see the cat. Right away you could smell the weed on him. just offbeat :) I am a 18+ year old boy. About 14 or 15 years ago, my wife had just gotten out of the shower and was sitting at her vanity blow drying her hair. The band was seated on the stage. r/AskReddit is the place to ask and answer thought-provoking questions. u/nakedmunch. Not embarrassing for me, but it is for my wife. Lobster Diver Swallowed by Whale. My family and much of my extended family were at a buffet, my sister was about 12-13. I was working at one of the fast food coffee shops. Fell on the ground hitting my head hard enough to get a minor concussion. After my boyfriend went to bed, I would often stay up, to read or watch TV. • "Will you help me with my homework," the kid asked. Brengrus. It absolutely perplexed us seeing a 48 year old man playing with a kids toy lol. They jumped out of the truck and hid underneath it until the raid was over, and were among the few survivors. 2 Personal Embarrassing Moments about me and then one about my dad :D. Second, here is a hot list of the rules of TFTS: Rule 0 - YOUR POST MUST BE A STORY ABOUT TECH SUPPORT - Just like it says. Crazy work story from a couple months ago. Updated on November 28, 2023. Faked a relationship with guy who used her friend for sex. One time a lightbulb from the light they move over you fell onto me and bounced onto my vintage leather coach satchel burning it. His father visited the young man in hospital. Story 3 This is a little tamer. But i felt dizzy and poured it all over my clothes. This is all in a one hour period. Uniting minds from around the globe, this unparalleled storytelling ecosystem enables users to transcend Probably more commonly known than some of the answers that you'll get, but the guy who posted on one of the relationships advice subs about his wife having an affair, they all told him to confront her, so he did, and she stabbed both kids so that "He can't have them in a divorce". “I once saw a resume that stated they were a “valid Victorian”. While on recruiting duty in texas, we had a guy come in to the office, said he was interested in joining. First one, I was doing public address (P. (er nurse) so we got an order and inserted. The place looked like a murder scene. Unfortunately, after a bunch of mediocre results, their chances were starting to slide away. Apr 23, 2021 · When I would not admit to knowing what a potato was, the father especially began to get annoyed. 307. A few months ago, a woman arrived with a large suitcase, stating she would be staying for a few weeks due to a nearby modeling shoot. Pad thai, meatballs, wings, caviar, smoked salmon, cheeseball, and other items of black death. Reply. I always say "he's so wholesome he sparkles" reserved. People started laughing because I was looking really confused while talking gibberish, but then I started crying because I was tripping and felt like they were making fun of me lmao. I ran over to try to drag my dog back inside, as the bear turned around to face us. The friendlier part of Reddit. Turns out he was throwing me a surprise party. • 12 yr. So they evacuated to a hotel, but they really like it because it reminds them of being on tour. Looking for funny Navy stories (preferably ship-based) Mornin' shipmates, In addition to a (recent) Navy veteran, I'm also an aspiring writer. He put his hands in his face and said, "I can't believe that I fell for that. com/r/AskReddit/comments I love the Hilarious nature of CK2, and just the perfect storms that can arise I wanna hear your funniest stories. Let's go into the new year laughing. Three men were at the gates of heaven, but there was only room for one person. It remains to this day the single most creepiest/unexplained thing that has ever happened to me. We ask each other lots of silly questions to pass the time. Rule 1 - ANONYMIZE YOUR INFO - Keep your personal and business names out of the story. Lmao a Corpsman who did 20 years and retired was still working at Meps medical, while we were in the room doing the duck walk and shit, he was telling the recruits some stories about his time serving with marines. He pauses, and slowly backs into the burning building, closing the door, the shape of a minotaur imputed in the door and the surrounding wall. Opening the door sheepishly, he looks out, seeing a row of warforged police pointing laser rifles at the door. We debated on that for a long time, and I learned that most of my coworkers are idiots. Anything at all, here's the first time I tried cocaine: I was a freshman in college, first semester. xh gv hg mj zc hn ac ey ip jj